"Our vritti do not compel us to fate, but offer a golden opportunity to evolve." Bhavani Maki
Sean and I have spent the last week and a half in some cities of Guatemala (Xela, Chichi, and Coban). Yesterday we spent over 6 hours on two different buses, twisting and turning through the western highlands, deserts that reminded us of eastern Washington, small village markets, and through an extremely large landslide that happened during the last wet season. We arrived in Coban tired, a little irritable but still in love! After walking around for 45 minutes looking for a hostel to stay in with a double bed, we settled on a private room with two twins that we smooched together. Our dinner was the same way. We wandered and wandered until finding a spot that was inexpensive and had the most amazing fried plaintains for dessert! Highlight of the day for sure. The city life is a hustle and bustle of diesel engines, loud music, and very little green space. So we're heading for the jungle river valley around Semuc Champey for the next little bit where we can hike, swim in caves, and nestle into the sounds of birds.
During our time living the city life, I've found myself waiting. For something. For anything. To make me feel content. To stop the twists and turns of my mind. A delicious meal, a good cup of coffee, a quote that stands out, a hot spring lit up by a starry sky or even a passage written in my journal. I'm waiting for the next thing. The next adventure, hike or chicken bus ride. I see the winding pathway that the movements of my mind are taking, yet am unable to yield to them. This is my work - to sharpen my sword of attention so that I won't be enveloped by the power of the shifts. As I become more aware of these vritti, I sense a great opportunity for evolution.
I often wonder if I have the tools to move forward with this process. If I possess the devotion, strength, or focus for intentional development. I get so caught up in the depth of my mind, that my confidence, which was instilled so early on in my life, becomes lost. My sense of home, comfort, security fades away, and doubt, dis-ease, and fear rise up. I see these samskaras, or the repetition of tendencies that eventually become habits, but my reaction to them still feels important.
What I keep reminding myself is that this process, these patterns, are here to teach me something. Be open to what they are saying. Experience what my body says without judgment, which means that I need to get into my body every day - something that I haven't necessarily been doing. Even a little bit of yoga/meditation/devotion (writing/mantras/mandalas) will keep me on the path towards evolution.
My answer to this calling right now: Nature always brings me to a sense of awareness and stillness and awe. That is where we are going!
I am on the journey to create joy and live with full happiness. And my wish for you is to do the same!
Older Blog Archives can be found here!